Christmas

Christmas Day came and went. The activities which we have been planning for seemed like a blur to me, partly because I have been feeling physically unwell. But mostly, I think that it's due to a lack of reflection / ownership on my part.

I am a person who likes to be very deliberate and purposeful in my actions, especially for big events such as Christmas. No doubt I am able to rattle off the "model" answer as to why we were involved in all the activities, but it remains a head knowledge as long as my heart is not sold out to it. It is easy to get carried off with all the plannings, practices, and miss out on the very fundamental purpose why we were working so hard.

What had my motivation been? Sheer commitment and responsibility to the group? I believe so... Not a nice confession at all eh? My motivation had somewhat been misplaced. What I really needed was a deep, heartfelt conviction that could come from the Lord Himself. What difference would it make to the programs? I wonder, but at least, I would have approached Christmas with a keener consciousness of God's presence, which would have resulted in a changed attitude.

Well, all is not lost. The new year is coming, signalling a new beginning. I would really like to start off the year with the right footing, with my eyes fixed on Jesus.

"Teach me Your way, O Lord, and I will walk in Your Truth;

Give me an undivided heart, that I may fear Your Name..."

Psalm 86:11